Action Blogs

by Judy Brown
 

Judy Brown is Preseident of P-FLAG NSW.

Speaking as president of PFLAG NSW Inc. (a support group for parents, families and friends of lesbian & gay people), I have come across many same-sex couples who have been together for more than twenty years. In most cases they are very committed to each other and have endured many years of social discrimination and human rights abuse. They feel that it is their social right to make a formal and legal commitment to each other and we support them in this. If they are committed in a loving same-sex relationship, they virtually have no legal rights when compared to a married or de-facto couple. They have no access to next of kin rights, family medicare/ health funds, superannuation, etc. Being a parent of a gay child raises awareness of these inequities and I am not prepared to have my child treated as a second class citizen all his life. It must be remembered that being gay or lesbian is not a lifestyle choice. Many go through years of anxiety trying to accept themselves, before they have the courage to reveal their same-sex attraction to family or friends. Many, who are not accepted by family, suffer depression, often resulting in suicide.

There is simply no logical reason why same-sex couples should not be allowed all the same benefits and rights as heterosexual couples. To legislate otherwise is not only discriminatory but demonstrates the irrational prejudice against homosexuality that exists among many of our politicians and legislators. Civil unions and partnership registries are a start, certainly, but marriage in Australian society affords benefits and status beyond civil unions. Not all same-sex couples want marriage and neither do all heterosexual couples, but in a fair society, they should all have the same option.

My husband and I have three children. All have loving partners, good jobs, mortgages and all pay tax. Five years ago, we celebrated the marriage of our eldest daughter and presently we are preparing to do the same for our youngest daughter. We yearn for the day when our son and his partner can have that same experience and for it to be widespread, official and legal.